Thursday, August 28, 2008
First let me explain the Naomi Judd thing. We actually had the chance to become BFF’s, but I kind of blew it. I was at the St. Louis airport making a connecting flight. It was a tight connection and I was already taking a risk by making a pit stop before boarding – but, when you gotta go, you gotta go… I walked into the restroom behind another woman that entered the stall next to me. All I could see was the back of her high, red hair. Because I have a very inquiring mind, I was already kind of curious about the high-hair, red-headed lady because I noticed that the sky cap was waiting for her outside the restroom holding her carry-on’s (this was before 9/11). It struck me as odd because the carry-on’s didn’t look that heavy or large, but for some reason she was paying this guy to carry them for her. And they were expensive carry-on’s, too. Hmmmm….
So as I take care of business in my stall and exit, she is also exiting a couple of seconds ahead me. Again, all I could see was the back of her high, red hair. Then, as we were washing our hands I spotted her face in the mirror. Is it her? Could that possibly be Naomi Judd? Then I got REALLY curious when she went up to the cleaning lady in the restroom, handed her some cash (I couldn’t tell how much), and said to her as she placed the money in her hand, “You work hard for what you do, thank you.”
Well GAW-AW-LEE!!! Did that ever get my attention! Now I’m really intrigued. So we walk out of the restroom at about the same time and she looked dead center into my eyes and said “hello.” So of course I had to start gabbing right back. I’m sure she thought, “Why in the world, of all the people in this airport, did I have to say hello to chatty patty?” I said something to her like, “You are just one of my favorite people.” She responded with, “well, thank you – where are you headed?” So we start walking together down the terminal having conversation about where each of us is going (and of course I’m walking the opposite direction of where my flight is currently boarding), and the conversation starts flowing. Well, it’s flowing for me anyway, as in I can’t shut up. I mention to her that I had been in Nashville just a couple of weeks before and coincidentally met her publicist; she asked how I knew her publicist and I mentioned a mutual friend of ours (there really is 6 degrees of separation), and we just kept yakking. It was like a BFF reunion y’all – I’m serious! We could have just continued on our trip together, had dinner, and then gone to her house to chat it up with Ashley and Wynonna…
But then, all of a sudden I hear someone yell my name: “Debi…. DEBI… Is that you?” We both turn around and look and there is a man about 20 yards from us waving and smiling and saying, “It IS you, I thought that was you!”
How do I get myself in these situations??? I have my chance to become best friends with Naomi, and now I have this man prying me away from her. Imagine this y’all: I’m with Naomi Judd, and someone else is acting like they’re about to wet their pants because they just spotted ME. What is wrong with this picture? Not to mention that I REALLY need to be boarding my plane and I’m getting further and further away from the gate. Why is this man excited to see me and NOT Naomi? I wasn’t even Lavender Chick yet… I was just a Sales Chick.
Okay, Naomi and I are both standing there in mid-conversation and she’s actually waiting on me to see what we’re going to do. Are we going to keep walking and talking and finish our conversation? Am I going to ditch her for the man hollering my name? Am I going to totally ignore the man yelling my name and tell Naomi he's a weirdo and let's keep talking? What to do? What to do ….
So who’s the man? I know you’re wondering. If this wasn’t all just the worst timing y’all. At the time I was working in outside sales. This man just happened to be a VERY important customer; in fact, he was my TOP customer at the time and I was really trying to close him on some business. I was actually shocked that he even recognized me because he hardly ever gave me the time of day when I made sales calls on him. Let me put this into perspective for you. Say you were trying to sell a widget to Microsoft and Bill Gates all of a sudden wanted to talk to you. This was kind of the equivalent. Sort of – you know what I mean. He was the key decision maker of the key decision maker; just the fact that he knew my name was a big deal. Kind of like tee-teeing next to Naomi is kind of a big deal….
Naomi is looking at me with this look of, so what are you going to do? She’s actually waiting on ME to make a decision. Simultaneously, my name is being announced over the intercom for final boarding!!! Can you believe it? I’ve got the airlines, Naomi Judd, and the equivalent of Bill Gates all wanting a piece of me at the same exact nano-second. And of all places, I'm in the St. Louis airport, hundreds of miles from home.
When it rains it pours.
I’m completely frantic – DECISIONS, DECISIONS, DECISIONS… Do I miss my flight? Do I blow off Naomi? Do I ignore Bill Gates?
At this point I just act like a total goon (I’m never calm under pressure), and say to Naomi, “I’m sorry but I have to go – he’s a really big customer and my flight is leaving and I was late before I ever started talking to you, I’m not even going the right direction to board my plane, and you see I’m in sales and that guy is just a real big deal, and I can’t ever see him in his office…” When I’m nervous I talk really fast, so I’m sure she didn’t get one word of what I was saying. I just remember saying “SEE YA” as I turned and walked towards my Bill Gates customer, leaving Naomi with her jaw dropped to the floor.
And you know what? I got moved off that big account about a month later and never even got to reap the benefits of blowing off Naomi for pseudo-Bill Gates… And you know what else? I told my Bill Gates-type customer that I was talking to Naomi Judd and he said, "I don't believe I know her, do you work together?"
So why am I telling you all this? Sorry, but I kind of got off-course. Imagine that. I really just wanted to tell you about chance happenings and that a story ran in the Dallas Morning News earlier this week about farmers that blog. I was actually mentioned in the article, which then led to the Texas Ag Commissioner, Todd Staples, mentioning the article on his blog. Who knew? Even the Ag Commissioner blogs…
As a result, I have had some really interesting visitors on my blog for the past several days, and I just wanted to say THANKS for stopping by and hope you keep visiting. Yes, this is a farm blog, but I get diarrhea of the mouth (I mean fingers, since I’m typing) and sometimes go off on tangents that don’t have a thing to do with farming. Kind of like what I’m doing right now, so I’ll just end here and go take a nap (or maybe a bubble bath).
I’ve exhausted myself.
Friday, August 22, 2008
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
I spent the first twenty years of my life trying to figure out how to become a big city girl and ditch the small town I grew up in. All I wanted out of life was to live in the city and have a cool apartment like Mary Tyler Moore. Well, I got myself a great pad in the city - only to spend the next twenty years trying to figure out how to be a small town girl again. See what I mean? Life comes full circle.
You might also remember how I told y’all a few weeks ago that I was on a diet. It all started after my bad haircut made me look frumpy. Then I realized, I don’t look frumpy – I AM frumpy.
My frump has come full circle.
I started out life as a frump with a poochy tummy and robust thighs.
Forty years later, I have a poochy tummy and robust thighs. NO – I’m not going to post a picture of me today in an orange bikini so you can see the similarities of today and forty years ago. You will just have to take my word for it…
My life AND my body has come full circle.
As I got to thinking about the full circle stuff, I realized that I’m built just like my grandmother. I even told Lisa the other day that I really need to lose weight and get in shape because when I was getting out of the tub I saw myself in the mirror and realized I looked just like my grandmother naked. I was completely mortified. ME – looking like my grandmother naked!
But then I realized that it’s what I have left of her.
It’s who I am.
It’s who she was.
Sunday, August 10, 2008
I mean, come on - everything is better in pairs. After all, we have two eyes, two arms, two legs, two kidneys.... It's always best to have two because, well - then you always have a spare.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
Do you know what that is?
It's hair. We've just been all about hair at Hummingbird Farms. I spent a luxurious hour brushing out the hooligans (a.k.a., Poncho & Lefty), our two Great Perinese babies. Well, I still call them babies, but they're actually 4 years old now. Time flies. They are hooligans, yes indeed, but we love them anyway. It was actually my Mother-in-law that coined them "the hooligans." When they were about 4 months old Jack and I went on a vacation and she flew here all the way from Florida to take care of them for us. Great Perinese are herding dogs, and yes, they must have something to herd. If they don't have a herd to herd, they will create a herd. They decided that Jack's mom was their herd, all 99 pounds of her. Yes y'all, my 99 pound Mother-in-Law somehow gave birth to my husband who is 6'3" and, well - I won't say his weight, because that would be rude, but I will tell you when he played college football he weighed 235. I figure it's okay if I tell you that, being that they talk about what everyone weighs on a football team. Jack's father was 6'5" and everyone called him "Little Jack." Jack's grandfather was "Big Jack," and yes, he was bigger than Little Jack. Okay, somehow I've gotten off track about the Jack's. Let's get back to the hooligans.
When Jack and I got back from our vacation we asked his mother how everything went while we were gone. She said, "Everything was fine with the cats, but those hooligans!" It seems they herded her from one end of the house to the next for six straight days. She couldn't even get up to walk 3 feet to the bathroom without them right next to her, herding her to the pot. She was a little exhausted when we got home. Anyway, we've called them "the hooligans" ever since.
Okay - so, I brushed them for at least an hour, it may have been closer to 2 hours, and filled up that darn garbage bag full of hair. I feel kind of wasteful, like I need to do something useful with all that hair like knit a sweater or something. And it's not like I won't have this same amount of hair when I brush them out next week. I don't know where it all comes from!
One thing I know for sure is that the hooligans and I are having some major hair dilemmas...
Many of you may be thinking that I have way too many dogs if I can fill up a tall kitchen garbage bag with hair. I won't even tell y'all how quickly I can fill up my Oreck vacuum cleaner bags with hair. I love Mr. Oreck; he has made our house so much more hair free. I also think I have made him much richer with all the vacuum cleaner bags I buy from him...
I'll take the dog hair any day; I really can't imagine a home without a big fat cat and a sweet loving dog, or two or ten. So, I figure it's not that I don't need another dog, I just need one that doesn't shed. I will always make room for another dog. Or cat. Or bird. Or elephant. I would love an elephant, but I just haven't been able to find one to purchase anywhere, and the pound hasn't come across any homeless elephants lately. But, one of these days...
So back to brushing out the hooligans. After working on them for almost 2 hours, they decided they had been still long enough and took off running.
Yes, they managed to find the only water hole in the hill country. So much for all that brushing out I did...
Here they are being all pitful and begging at the door to come in after playing in the water/mud hole. You can get an idea of their size by seeing the table behind them. They are almost as tall as the table, only about and inch shorter. They think, however, that they're little baby poodle dogs and they want to crawl up in your lap. This brings me to my next subject: poodle dogs.
They don't shed.