Thursday, August 6, 2009

It feels like home...

As a child, teenager, college student, and young adult, I went on too many road trips to count to Lajitas (pronounced LA-he-tus) in far West Texas; although for the last few years I've rarely been and have missed it tremendously. This is where I grew up and what I still consider home. To me, home is that place that gives you that feeling you get of calmness and peace. I guess I’m really fortunate because I get that feeling when I’m home at Hummingbird Farms, but also when I’m home in West Texas. Come to think of it, I also get it when I’m near the sea and breathing that salty air….

Lavender Chick’s definition of home: On familiar ground in which you feel in harmony with your surroundings; a feeling or a place of peace, comfort, and security.

Perhaps I’m ambidextrous in the home department being that I can get that home feeling in more than one place... One thing’s for sure – home would never be a place to me that I couldn’t have my animals. It just wouldn’t be right. Some of you may still be looking for home, but most of you, I hope, have found it and are living it. My mother has moved to a new house and I was asking her last week while visiting if it felt like home. For some reason, it's so important for me to know that you always feel "at home."

Sami (one of my special friends that I grew up with that can finish my sentences for me) and her 14-year-old daughter and I decided we needed some soul cleansing, and of course the only place we know we can always achieve this without fail is to drive way out west.

Oh – on a completely other note, I have also discovered that taking a road trip with a 14-year-old is kind of nice because we can borrow each others zit medicine. It’s that much less to pack…

Okay, so the three of us headed west and had a wonderful, wonderful time. Now that I have shown you some pictures of this trip, I have to show you a couple of pictures of my last trip to Lajitas with Jack, which was actually almost 9 years ago.

This is Jack at DOM, holding a box of DOM. Those of you that have seen the movie ‘Fandango’ will know what I’m talking about. I won’t go into detail here because this is the subject of a whole other post. But – anyone that has graduated from the University of Texas has most likely seen this movie, being that it is quite the UT cult movie and kind of a rule that you must see it in order to be a true UT alum.

This is a picture of me just before we approached DOM. I have to say that this is THE MOST favorite picture I have of myself because it makes me feel like home. Why? Well, let me see how I can put this into words (or type). First of all, this place in which I’m standing is a spiritual place for me because it makes me feel small. Does that make sense? I guess to me, it is such a beautiful place and it makes me feel that, in the grand scheme of things, I’m just little ole me in a great big gigantic world that was created by something much bigger and grander.

But, another reason I like this picture and why it makes me feel like home is because it is the last picture I have of myself that actually portrays what my old boobs used to look like. As some of you know that have been reading my blog, I lost those two boobs to cancer a few years ago. Ironically, I have a lot of pictures of myself, but none that really provide any detail of my old boobs. I find it quite appropriate that the last and only picture I can find of my old boobs is at this place that I love so much and that means so much to me.

I miss those boobs. They felt like home.


Painted Groove Girl said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Painted Groove Girl said...

You didn't prepare me for this one ... I had no idea where you were going with it and didn't realize I needed Kleenex.

Recognized your old boobs immediately in the photo. Isn't it funny how we never appreciate what we've got til it (or they're) gone ... might be a lesson for me in there somewhere.

I'll have to think about that... loved our trip. You're the best. And I loved your contributions to the "raising" of my 14-year-old daughter. I know she did, too.

Sir Nottaguy-Imadad said...

Take you red shoes out of the closet and put them on. Now close your eyes, click your heels three times and say "There's no place like home". If that doesn't take you back, the handy photo album will.
I'm not a fan of red shoes, but if they would really transport you, I'd totally buy them.

MotherT said...

I have a place in southern West Virginia that always feels like home to me. It doesn't matter how long I've been away, or what changes have occurred, it's HOME. (Our nice little Central Ohio town is Home, too, but then anywhere that Sir Nottaguy and I are together will most likely feel like home!)

Thanks for sharing a little glimpse of the past, and a little piece of your heart. ((HUGS))

Greyeyes said...

I'm with Sami on the Kleenex thing. I certainly identify with Home and for me Home isn't only those places that validate your existence, but also the people that shape your life along the way.
I miss my Daughter.
Thanks for a tragically beautiful post. Your Friend Dave

Justine said...

Deb, what a beautiful place this is. I'm so glad you got to take a trip there with your friend and her daughter.

I had no idea that you'd had a double mastectomy. I had no clue you'd suffered through cancer. But I sure am glad to know you as a survivor! And hey, your boobs were cute, but I'm glad you got rid of them.

Justine :o )

Vickie said...

Didn't know about your mastectomy. "They" may be gone, but "YOU" are still here and that's good.

Home is several places to me, too, altho in the same locale. Where I grew up as a kid, then I couldn't wait to get married and leave, and after a year, couldn't wait to come back "home". Been here ever since. I don't plan on leavin' here again to live until I get called "home" someday.

cottage farm villa said...

That second photo is just breathtaking!!!!!!

Bridget said...

ROFL at the bennies of traveling with at 14 year old.
The photos of Lajitas (did I spell it right?...I did pronounce it right even with out your key!...must be my CA upbringing that helped with that.) are just gorgeous, it must be positively breathtaking in person. I know photos just can't do something like that the justice it really deserves.
Give all the critters a big kiss for me, especially Bob!

LivingTheLife said...

I loved these pictures...and I feel the same way when I am surrounded by vastiness and beauty...makes me know I'm just a small part of this old world...but very thankful I am. I get those same at home feelings in Taos, N.M., at the Grand Canyon (that I was just blessed in getting to see) along any coast line...and in the mountains...but I am learning now with this big move...HOME is wear I choose to flourish, to plant myself and surround myself with nature, things I love, my family and my animals...what more could I want!

And as for your boobs...they are very nice boobs...but I rather like your new ones (even though I have never met them or you in person) because of are here...with all of us to love, laugh and share things with...and I think my life is fuller b/c of it!

Check out my post son in law turns 30 and I wanted to celebrate his about someone who loves life.


Laura said...

Amazing post- as usual.
You are a natural storyteller.


Justabeachkat said...

Hi Girlfriend! Remember me? I've been such a bad blog friend lately. Life has been crazy/busy and my computer time has been limited. I hate it.

What a gorgeous place! I understand. When I stand on our beach with my toes in the water and look out at the horizon, I feel small...and my God feels so BIG.

As a cancer survivor myself, I know how you feel looking back at old photos. The one of George and I on the golf cart on my blog sidebar was taken 3 years ago right before I was diagnosed. Sometimes I look at it and think "I didn't know what was coming".

Great post!


Anonymous said...

Bless your heart,this made me cry.I wish you had your old boobs back too. I'd give you mine, but you wouldn't want them.
Love and miss seeing you